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These two months leading up to our triumphant departure from the Middle East have been entirely surreal. Husband got increasingly caught up in work as he and David tried to identify investors/partners for The Company. This involved high summit meetings, gritty discussions, presentations, vats of coffee and what I considered an unnecessary amount of air-chopping.

In my spare time – between interviewing and commissioning shipping agents; dealing with Real Estate Agents to identify tenants; showing people around the house; arranging maintenance; changing mobile numbers; selling my car and anything we couldn’t take with us; arguing with our mortgage company; (etc) – I worked for The Company:

“Husband, are you MANAGING me?”

“Not at all, I’m just suggesting the best way to do it.”

Part of my role was providing feedback and sanity checks to the guys, who were preparing presentations for potential investors. Neither Husband nor David appeared to consider it excessive spending half an hour discussing a single presentation point and whether it should go on slide 3 instead of slide 2 and should they use the word ‘disk’ instead of ‘hard drive’ and did it really encapsulate the essence of The Company’s spirit?

(I’m not sure I ever fully grasped what exactly was the essence of The Company’s spirit; David arguing that it was feisty and daring, not cheeky but a little bit saucy with a spicy, sexy fragrance, and Husband seeming to feel that it was more the timely provision of software solutions.)

The day before a key presentation, we were running through the slide show.

“The third bullet point,” I said, “’The Company has a corporation in the UK’ – do you feel maybe this is overstating a bloke with a modem? I mean, it might give rise to awkward questions if you imply The Company runs a sweatshop in Manchester.”

“Hmm,” said David.

“No,” said Spouse, “Potential Partner never gives us enough credit for the number of employees The Company has and it’s about bloody time they realise we have fourteen employees in Dubai and an office in the UK as well. They act like we have, like, three people in the Dubai office and it really PISSES ME OFF!”

“Em, ok,” I said after a brief pause. “I’m sure tomorrow’s presentation is an ideal opportunity to vent your frustration and tell them what a bunch of assholes they are!”


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