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‘Breakthrough to Success’ involved a number of exercises to practice the faith, reinforce The Message and obscure the fact that we spent three days covering material that would comfortably fit into half an hour.

 

One exercise involved identifying ‘limiting beliefs in your life. Afterwards, Guru Howard asked for volunteers to share their revelatory, life-altering breakthroughs. The microphone was passed to Bruce.

 

“Kia Ora, BRUCE!” roared 1000 people.

 

“What’s your limiting belief, Bruce?” enquired Guru Howard.

 

“I hate myself, I hate my life, I hate my family,” said Bruce, “and I wish I had been born a woman.”

 

I laughed so hard I fell off my seat – until I realized I was the only one: the guy was serious.

 

“I see,” said Guru Howard. “Eeeeeer. And how does this affect your life, Bruce?”

 

“Quite a lot,” said Bruce. “Like, I’ll do something I’m proud of. Like painting the spare room. And then I’ll go and ruin it all by saying something stupid to my wife or beating my kids. They hate me and I hate them. Not just them – I hate everything.”

 

“Umm,” said Guru Howard. “So, what’s your limiting belief, Bruce?”

 

“I think my limiting belief is that I’m unlovable,” said Bruce.

 

I could see where he was coming from.

 

“Give him a big hand, folks! Yeah! Bruce!”

 

At the time, I was sitting beside an enormous man in a vest, who was so overcome with emotion he had to resort to deodorant.

 

“I’m a but whuffy, time for the smullies,” he informed me, before spritzing strawberry scented body spray all over the two of us. I had coped with his fetid underarm stench, but when it combined with the jagged strawberry smell, I seriously considered throwing up.

 

“You will not puke, you will not puke,” I internally positively self-affirmed. “Wait! No! I feel entirely healthy! My stomach is in top form! There is no stomach acid whatsoever – argh!”

 

Two minutes later, we were required to hug the person sitting next to us.

 

Now, THAT was a life-changing experience.

 

Later, we were split into pairs to discuss where we were MOST STUCK in our lives and WHY. Rebecca went first:-

 

“I’m- I’ve- my relationships are awful. My relationship with my family is- well, if things don’t change, that’s it; it’s over between my husband and me. This is kind of the end of the line. I- we can’t find anything nice to say to each other any more. And I’m taking it out on the kids and I know it’s so unfair, I feel dreadful. So I think- I think I need to change my approach and be more loving and change how I think about my family and show them I cherish them.”

 

I actually gave this stranger a spontaneous, totally unprompted hug before it was my turn.

 

“Um, ok, well, I’m a writer. And I’m having trouble writing. Ah, that’s kind of it, really.”

 

At least there is one thing I have learned from ‘Breakthrough to Success’:

 

My life is awesome

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