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Me> You know Rub A Dub Dub?

Me> Three men in a tub?

Me> The butcher-

Husband> The baker and- who was it again?

Me> The candlestick maker, yeah. Now, if they’re at sea several weeks they’ll get pretty hungry, so they’ll probably have to eat one of them. You know: instead of all three dying of starvation, only one dies.

Me> Of cannibalism.

Husband> Um-

Me> Well, it’s pretty obvious who’s going to be on the menu.

Husband> It is?

Me> Of course! It’s going to be fillet of candlestick maker. Because there’s no call for candles in modern society.  

Husband> Well, I don’t know. The candlestick maker might-

Me> Shed some light on the situation? Hur hur hur. Hurhur.

Husband> Jesus, there’s always one.

Husband> Wait- what about the baker?

Me> No. It’s feasible – perhaps improbable but still within the bounds of possibility – that the baker might somehow procure the raw materials to make bread and therefore feed the other two.

Husband> I think that’s pretty unlikely.

Me> Whatever.

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Comments on: "Rub a dub dub, the candlestick maker’s grub" (2)

  1. If ‘Jack & The Beanstalk’ is to be believed, and I see no reason why it shouldn’t, then the baker could make a perfectly acceptable bread – to giants, at least – out of the candlestick maker’s bones.

    So there.

  2. Is there a pea green boat involved in all of this?

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