Part III: The crumpet saga

To those of you who regularly read Deadlyjelly, or know me – even just a little bit – it will come as no surprise that there is a part III to The Crumpet Saga.

Because I refuse to accept defeat. Not only that, but I don’t recognise defeat; and furthermore I won’t acknowledge it OR give it a lift if if I see it hitchhiking in the rain.

Naturally I was going to give the crumpet recipe another go.

On my first attempt, when I threw out the remainder of the batter, I’d noticed flour clotted in the corners of the bread maker. That explained it! – the reason the batter was slightly runny resulting in crumpety tragedy.

So two days ago, I tried again.

This time, I was rigorous about button pressing and incorporating recalcitrant flour with a spatula and letting the batter sit for precisely 20 minutes.

Now, Jed is not a greedy dog, and generally avoids the kitchen due to the dangers of getting his tail trodden on or catching a pot of boiling noodles with his head. Unless, of course, he smells cheese; in which case he sits on my heels with infinite patience until it falls into his gaping maw.

Before I even poured the first crumpet into the frying pan, Jed was camped out on the kitchen floor with knife and fork.

I could probably use my dog as a barometer for culinary success. Evidently there is no substitute for canine intuition. This batch of crumpets was almost worse than the first. I experiemented with intensity of heat and length of cooking time, but the result was catastrophic crumpet carnage. Jed ate two batches, before I threw out the rest of the batter.

At least the dog enjoyed them . . .

. . . he barfed them up later.